So I came up with this amazing idea of alumni club. Voilà , welcome to the club! Our activities are:

1. Football this saturday, beer afterwards.
10. More football this sunday, more beer too.

Now I know that’s not prestigious enough. Club & associations nowaday need to look or pretend to look high-class to improve the social status of its members. Just ask most khmers with a Lexus Range Rover. Well then, shall we invite some Excellencies to join our football session too? We’re pretty sure the Excellencies would be more involved rather than bore themselves to the oblivion with hour-long speeches by some random unknowns like us.

Talking about invitation, we hope you don’t mind we cannot put up the invitation in the national newspaper like other prestigious clubs. We’re only used to caveman means of communications through the things called letter, email or phone. It’s a bit lame and cheapo, but hey you’ll get football and beer. What else can you ask for?

Hope that with this guide, those who cannot followed would have some ideas of what going on. Not to say it’s always correct, remember it’s just a guide.

• First 10 mins: Salutation to each guest in the event, name by name completed with name title followed by cheers and clappings. (forgetting the name title may get the speaker fired)
• 10-30mins: Nice complimentary speech on the speaker boss, upper boss, big boss, all the bosses up the heirachy followed by cheers and clappings. (in related news, the TV seems to broadcast only this part)
• 30-50mins: History lessons and reminders of the past between 1975 till now followed by cheers and clappings.
• 50-55mins: Summary of the acheivements of the speaker’s team followed by cheers and clappings.
• 55-70mins: Classic text-book pledges for the better future followed by cheers and clappings.
• 70-80mins: Nice complimentary speech on the speaker boss, upper boss, big boss, all the bosses up the heirachy followed by cheers and clappings. (I’m wrong, the TV loves this part too)
• 80-90mins: Thanks to each guest in the event, name by name completed with name title followed by cheers and clappings. (forgetting the name title may get the speaker fired)

1. Look what I got for breakfast! The most awesome sandwich ever…………………..ever.
2. Behold! the new song by a random youtube video. I’m not sure whether you like it, but I don’t care.
3. Here is a cute cat picture I got from a random internet surfing.
4. I feel I need to share this amazing story I got from some random email forwarder, please forward this story to 100 friends otherwise the earth will explode.
5. Check out my facebook page for an update on my twitter page which I tweet about an update in my blog page which I ask to check out my tumblr page which I have some update about my IM status. And all theses are done while I am in the toilet doing a rather important business.

You just love the internet that it single-handedly gives all meanings to all theses.

Anyway I’ve decided to keep the same theme and design I have since the start  4 years ago with a few minors changes:

• you can now comment on all pages, not just blog posts
• the post title is cleaned to remove all small meta details and font size is slightly increased
• the comment link is moved to the bottom right of the post instead of just under the title
• all unecessary post items, links and inactive links are removed

It sure is quiet in here, I could hear the echo.

>ping “anybody home?”

Type escape sequence to abort.

Sending 5, 100-byte ICMP Echos to ”anybody home?”, timeout is 2 seconds:

…..

Success rate is ∞ percent (∞/∞), round-trip min/avg/max = ∞/∞/∞ ms

Last year’s general public warnings!

Last last year’s general public warnings!

Khmer are patient, good thing or bad thing? Let see!

Told you already, Khmer are awesomely patient!

And more patient!

*Dilbert Comics by Scott Adams

Ideas lie deep, think dig harder, they’ll come out!

*Warning: Do not try this with your blog!

1. Welcome to “Koh Aksontesok” daily news, Cambodia’s most read newspaper. Today’s headlines are:

• “Traffic accident at Kbal Thnol causing minor injuries and major jam”
• “Fake rape story causes national outcry”
• “Superstitious witch craft blamed for latest series of traffic accidents”

2. Welcome to “See Ot Ot” TV, Cambodia’s biggest Television network. Today’s show is:

3. Welcome to “Hear Ot Ot” radio, Cambodia’s most popular radio show. The first song of the day titled “Crying girls and heart-broken guys”, requested by the Man Who Lacks Heart, is going out to:

Ms. Ni (thomthom), Ms. Na (bigbig), Ms. Né (phone star in poipet) , Mr. Nonaké, Mr. Eyké, Mr. Sondouy, Mr. Hearbroken (fellow man who lacks heart), Mr. Keke (fish vendor at Tonlé sap), Mr. Ko (hunter in Ratankiri) ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………. ………………………………. 10 minutes later ………………………………………….. ……………………………………………………………………………………………………………. bang nis, bang nus, bang nak, bang nok, bang nao, bang nong, à jak, à jem, à jok, à jom, à lom, à la, and all listeners to this program as well as all 14 million fellow khmers at home and abroad”

This song is coming right up, but first let’s meet our sponsor:

[..after the break...] Due to time constraint, we’re able to play only 30 seconds of the song. Let’s welcome our next program “Phone-in Karaoke”.

4. Welcome to “Roeung Ké Té”, Cambodia’s most subscribed magazine. Biggest story of this issue is:

Mr. Z, a rich man, is married to Mrs. Y. A well-known actress is rumored to be having something on with Mr. Z. Guess what will happen next? Fantastic prizes to be won!

5. Welcome to “Proleung” cinema, Cambodia’s most popular theater and cineplex. Today’s program is:

• 16:00 – 18:00 : An affair with her spirit! (a horror movie based on true story)
• 18:00 – 20:00 : Spirit awaken! (a horror story based on true movie)
• 20:00 – 22:00 : Mirror girl! (a true movie based on horror story)

6. Welcome to “Ha ha ha”, Cambodia’s most popular comedy show. Today’s show is:

**** ****  ******** **** ******** ******** **** **** **** ******** **** ******** ******** **** ******** **** **** ******** **** **** ************ ******** **** **** **** **** ******** ******** **** **** ******** ****

*Content could not be displayed due to extreme uses of profanity, drugs and mature references.

Next up, you googled for the recommended daily intake for blueberry. 1/2 cup size serving a day, it said. But how much crap is there in a cup, it never said. Lame recommendation. So you had to googled again for the size of a standard tea cup…. and found, around 230ml per cup.

Now, time for learning activation. Of course, for something so awesome like this, you’d need an activation process that is at least as awesome. You know those Power Rangers transformation thingy. They need to make some awesome gestures and shout “transform”. You probably need to do the same but just instead of “transform”, you shout “activate”. One of my juniors is still watching Power Rangers in case you need help.

That’s it. Now you need not worry about studying. Your brain will learn by itself. How cool could it be! As for reversing memory thing, it should be something similar to how they recover files from dead hard drive. Awesome!

*image courtesy of copied from BBC.

1. Music: music are hard to appreciate these days let alone listen to. CCNP (copy, cut n paste) perhaps sums up the music scene nicely. To spice things up a bit, add some half-Khmer-half-English to the mix. If there is one thing original about it, it must be that almost all of the songs are either about “crying girls” or “heart-broken guys“.  Didn’t know that the youth generation were this kinda sad.

2. Movies: people are scared of ghosts, but people love scary movies. Ghost movies are in every cinemas at almost every slots, ghost stories are everywhere, ghosts are behind you while you’re reading this, by the way.

3. Arts: When was the last time you befriended with someone so inspirational or just have some tastes in arts? Don’t remember anyone though…

4. Social life: Facebook, MySpace, Hi5, Blogger. Oh wait, they don’t call Blogger, they call Cloggers. C stands for Cool, Calm and Collected Cambodia, I guess. Whatever…

5. Football: people with a good taste in football are rare these days, the rest either call themselves ManU fans or are simply clueless about football.

6. Public behavior: 3 guys meet up in public. One guy pulls out something black resembling a brick. No! it’s his new Nokia N series. Not to be outcooled, the other guy starts showing off his new crying-girl and heart-broken-guy songs in his latest iThis, iThat, iWhatever-whatever. The third guy cannot hear a thing. How can he? when his music headset is bigger than his a**.

7. Names: his name is James. Right, his name is James. Back in his hometown, they call him “Ah Sampoch”. James, my a**.

8. Hobbies: “Let’s have a party! Can someone bring the cards?”. What the hell, can’t we even have a party for once without the petty gambling? No we can’t. I’m sure without playing cards, someone might go crazy of gambling starvation.

Thankfully though the world is created so that everyone has a place (to hide). The things I see as lame may be the coolest things to those on the other side of the spectrum. Wait, I should be careful of giving opinions these days, who know such thing could cause oil price to hit record high. Don’t blame me if tomorrow headline reads “Oil Price Hits Record High after someone from somewhere making some random remarks”.

Oh well, whatever…back to something more entertaining.

Last year’s general public warning!